Can there be too much Austen?

Do you ever find it to be the case that when you read a very stylized work of fiction, you find yourself so wrapped up in the language of it, it's difficult to speak like a normal person?
I do.

I have just finished reading Emma by Jane Austen. The impact of the language upon me was heightened because I had it in audio format as well from the library. So, while doing dishes, I would listen, and while sitting down to watch a show with the children, I would read.

Tangent:
When we lived in Wymount at BYU and got the Canadian channel, my husband could tell if I had been watching it always within minutes of coming home. I am absurdly open to suggestions of accent. Once, in high school, my sister and I were both being interviewed together for some kind of summer job. The lady interviewing us came from the deep South and had the fabulous accent to prove it. After we left her office, my sister accosted me, saying essentially, "What is wrong with you?! Were you trying to make fun of her or something?" Apparently, I had completely unconsciously taken up her accent as best I could and spoken with it for some length of the interview. In this one regard, I have sympathy for Madonna: If I moved to England, I would undoubtedly begin speaking in a presumably pretentious half-British, half-American way which would annoy everybody.

Thus it is, that all evening, I have had to refrain from the type of phraseology which would make me ridiculous. For example:

Do not you find it sometimes amusing to the point of hilarity the way in which young children do go on despite all forms of parental discouragement and professions of decorum?
Translation: Even when they're being totally disobedient, the kids are still pretty funny sometimes.

Can you yet conjecture so unlikely a scenario, so ill-conceived a notion as this tale of suspense and ardor, which still excites within one so complete a wish for successful and felicitous resolution for the heroine and her champion; at least so much as may be within their power to obtain?
Translation: Even though Twlight is complete fantasy, you just can't help but root for a happy ending, can you?

I guess you should all count yourselves fortunate that I haven't started on Dickens again, yet. His sentences are like a paragraph long. I wish I got paid by the word like he did.

Can you mix politics and cookies?

Did anybody else watch Dr. Phil today? Normally, I don't. I usually think he's a few shows away from becoming a Ph.D.'d Jerry Springer. But today he actually tried to have a very balanced discussion about gay marriage. I appreciated his effort. At the end, he asked each side if they thought there was a common ground they thought we could come together on to begin to heal the bitter feelings and words. Neither answer was satisfactory in my mind. So, here's what I would have said.

Yes, we are all children of God. I think that even when we disagree vehemently about something, we have within us the capacity to say, "I respect your point of view and can understand why you feel that way." And I think we can really mean it. It doesn't mean we won't battle long and hard for the thing in which we believe, but we can do it kindly. I know this is an issue that affects people in a very personal way, but it doesn't mean we have to make an ideological issue personal. No name-calling is ever necessary to make a point. We can say and act out the belief, "I respect you as much as myself. I mean you no ill will."

When we went to the D.C. Temple last Saturday for the sealing of my sister's adopted baby to her and her family, we knew there was a protest scheduled. I was honestly debating making cookies to take to the protestors. I didn't think I'd be able to make enough because the one in Manhattan had 5,000 people at it. But it rained all day in Virginia and Maryland, and when we arrived for the sealing, there were only 2 people in raincoats, holding signs.

I should've made the cookies. I was also worried they'd think it was some kind of evil trick and throw them at me or something, but maybe I was wrong. There has been ugliness on both sides of this issue--before, during, and after the vote. But I don't have to make my decisions based on those unfriendly acts. I should do what I think is right and kind and let the chips fall where they may. If I could do it over, here's what I would've done: I would've taken them cookies and said, "I'm really sorry our position on this issue has been hurtful to you. I know you're God's child just like I am and I'm sad for your pain and frustration. My view on this issue will not change, but I wish you no ill will. I made you cookies."

Maybe that's naive in the extreme. I can think of all kinds of possible ugly responses to that. But I can think of positive ones, too. As we left the Temple on Saturday, the rain had abated and 4 or 5 people were then protesting outside. One teenage girl with them smiled and waved as we drove by. And I smiled and waved back. Maybe she would've liked some cookies.

My babies...

Felled Trees and Gratitude

Several months ago the awesome Wayts family and Brother Shearman came and cut down and hauled away two big pine trees from our backyard that were killing the grass and taking up all our space. I still haven't thanked them properly. How do you thank Sister Wayts? She bakes, sews, cooks, does everything...better than I do. What can I do for her? Suggestions would be appreciated. Can you see how tiny Brother Wayts is next to the tree? And no damage done to person or property. Just amazing. I've gotta add props to my garbage lady who lent me a big truck free of charge so I could haul branches away. She even dropped it off and picked it up. Such a nice lady.

Beheaded and stupid

I have a more serious post in the works about why Proposition 8 is necessary, not because the Prophet said so, but because of the many devastating consequences we'll be faced with if it is not upheld. More later...

For now, here is a story my great friend told me when I visited her in Colorado last week. Her good friend (we'll call her Karen) has a 3 year old daughter who is in the midst of a roaring princess phase. So Karen, apparently concerned that her daughter may develop a helpless attitude with a desire to be rescued decided to spare her daughter a lifetime of disappointment. She told her that princess is not really much of a gig, because historically, they're usually beheaded.

I thought that was hilarious. But my own daughter is nowhere near princess-land yet.

Here's my confession. A couple years ago, I taught Junior Mint that girls who wear bikinis are stupid and do so because they're not smart enough to locate and put on all of their clothes. "You wouldn't want to go on a date with somebody who was too dumb to get dressed, would you?" I asked. Is that wrong?

Clearly, it will need to be amended in the future. The context was this...we were watching the scene in Aladdin where the genie is showing off his powers and summons two skimpily dressed girls in bikini tops, wearing veils who dance suggestively and try to kiss Aladdin. I didn't want Junior Mint thinking that kind of behavior from a girl was acceptable or that Aladdin should want to kiss them just because they were available.

It reminds me of a parenting moment from "Everybody Loves Raymond." Those horrible parents had told Robert that whenever the ice cream man's bell rang, it meant he was out of ice cream...

Do you have any such parenting faux pas? Am I (and my friend's friend) in it alone with this? What did your parents tell you?

Proposition 8

I watched The Return of the King last night instead of election coverage, because orcs eating people seemed cheerier to me than watching the Leftist media gloat. I will say, it's an exciting day for blacks in America and I hope Barack Obama's presidency will be the kind of change his followers hope for.

I was sent a disturbing email this morning about an anti-Mormon ad opposing Proposition 8 in California. Prop. 8 is a ballot measure in California, seeking to add wording to the state constitution clarifying that marriage is to be between a man and a woman. The battle has been heated, as you can imagine. If you want to watch "Mormon missionaries" ransacking the house of a lesbian couple and ripping up their marriage license, you can look it up the ad from 'Courage Campaign' on YouTube. I found it offensive in the extreme. It is always the case with liberal extremists that they say they want all views respected, when in reality, they have only respect for themselves. I can understand why people would oppose Proposition 8. But clearly, they do not extend the same courtesy as to why others might support it. The Church's response to this ad was characteristically classy.

Scott Trotter with the Church released this statement,
“The Church has joined a broad-based coalition in defense of traditional marriage. While we feel this is important to all of society, we have always emphasized that respect be given to those who feel differently on this issue. It is unfortunate that some who oppose this proposition have not given the Church this same courtesy.”

I remember when this was first a ballot measure in California several years ago while I was a student at BYU. I was surprised at how divided the campus--especially the professors--were on this issue. I remember one professor who I particularly admired being opposed to the Church's position mostly because of the extreme right groups it put us in camp with. Nobody likes to be thought of as intolerant. Heck, if the Church didn't have a position on gay marriage, I might not think it mattered. But I trust that the Prophet knows more. He is in the watch tower and it is his sacred responsibility to warn us when danger approaches, even if it doesn't look dangerous to us in the beginning. I think this issue and many others that members of the LDS faith may struggle with really boil down to whether or not you have a testimony of the divine call of the Prophet. If you don't believe he speaks for God, why would you care what he said? If he does, how can you possibly disregard it?

I'm including a link to a site supporting proposition 8. Read to the bottom and watch the video about how legalizing same-sex marriage has affected education in Massachusetts. It is disturbing, but not surprising.

http://www.godandscience.org/doctrine/yes_on_prop_8.html

I sometimes hear people suggest that the Church has no business in politics...I find this idea offensive. God makes laws...not the prophet, not the Church. If the laws of man run contrary to scriptural teachings, it is our responsibility to seek to change those laws. Man does not legislate morality. God already did that. We're just trying to keep in line with what he already taught. It is absurd to me that anyone would willingly compartmentalize or segregate the parts of their life in which they're willing to hear God...
"He can tell me how to eat, but not how to act out my sexuality...Our entire criminal justice system is based on the Ten Commandments, but we have no right to legislate morality....I'm willing to do what is already easy for me, but if His prophet asks something I'm uncomfortable with, I think it's none of His business." ????

Where gay marriage is concerned, this is plainly true. There is no discrimination against gay couples on the books in California. All the same rights are extended to them. Their relationship is just not called "marriage." By seeking that final title, they're not seeking equality in legal rights; they're forcing everyone else to acknowledge that their lifestyle is equally acceptable. They're seeking moral validation.

The Bishop will never ask you how you voted on an issue in a Temple recommend interview, and certainly it would not be appropriate. But if you are a faithful member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, you have covenanted to follow God's prophet. And if the prophet says we should do something--like support Proposition 8--and we choose not to, we are ignoring our testimony and choosing to consider the Prophet simply an old man with some advice we are also free to ignore. Either God leads this Church through his prophet, or he doesn't.

You may struggle internally--I certainly have on this issue. You may not understand every bit of reasoning behind the Church's official position. But if the Church has an official position, you have a responsibility to make it your own. If you choose against the prophet, you've chosen the wrong side, folks. This is not blind obedience, it is conscientious faithfulness. Besides, if people like to think of us as sheep, at least we can take comfort in following the voice of our Shepherd.

I like an old quote from Elder Neal A Maxwell of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. It seems particularly pertinent here. "There didn't seem to be any problem with conformity the day the Red Sea parted."