Monday, May 18, 2009

Not a compliment?

Have you ever had someone say something to you that seemed like a compliment, but then later wondered if that's what it really was? This happened to me a lot in high school. People told me often that I looked "comfortable." I'm pretty sure that wasn't actually a compliment. Has anyone ever told you that? I doubt it.

Last week, I watched Squeaky Bean at a soccer game as she fell down, dropped her french fries on the asphalt, stood up, picked up her french fries and put them back in her mouth.

"At least you got your fries," I said. "Good girl."

The man standing next to me said, "You are a very laid back mother. Most of the moms I know would be freaking out."

"Yeah, well, I was one of six growing up. I'm pretty relaxed," I responded modestly, secretly feeling smug to have avoided the panicky 'new mom' stage.

About a minute later, I thought, "Maybe that's not a compliment."

What do you think?

At least it's better than getting a slightly cushioned criticism. Ever have someone say something completely rude to you and then add, "No offense," like those two words were a magic eraser for the awful thing they just said? I still remember riding the bus home from school in the springtime of my 4th grade year. I was wearing shorts, sitting on the sticky brown vinyl seat and my legs were shaking with the force of the bumpy road and diesel engine. That's when my friend turned to me and said, "Your legs are flopping like a flounder out of the water. No offense."

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Busted...

the crime


the culprit


Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Pronouns

Junior Mint and I are working on pronouns in English. We are also working on not yelling at each other when we do school. (It's tough for us not to argue a lot since our personalities are so similar). Today, I got so mad about his nasty attitude that I left the room. Junior Mint stayed and did more of his English. He was supposed to be writing sentences using the 8 pronouns he's learned. Here are two of his sentences:

He hates his Mom.
She hates her Mom.


Sweet.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Movie Moment

You know that classic movie moment where a girl and a boy are running rapturously towards each other in a field of clover and wild flowers? (In slow-mo, of course). Well, I had a moment that's way better with my little Curly Fry last week.

We were on a local high school track having some family time. The boys were running around and my HubbaHubba and I were enjoying a leisurely stroll with a half-full double stroller. Curly Fry decided to catch up with us.

So, I turned and there he was, joyously running towards me down the track, his little legs going as fast as they could, a huge grin on his sweet little face. I ran towards him with my arms out, ready to scoop him up. When we met up, I picked him up. He squeezed me tight around my neck in a way only a little monkey of a kid can. I kissed his sweet curls. He squealed in delight and held on tight.

Perfect. Better than any movie.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Losing Doctors?

Several years ago, there was a major exodus of obstetricians out of the medical field because malpractice insurance had become so high. Now, more doctors will likely be forced out because President Obama is pursuing regulations (or the removal of regulations) that will force many conscientious medical professionals and hospitals to either perform abortions or quit practicing.

It's interesting...I didn't think gay marriage and abortion rights had anything to do with each other, but now there is a common thread--the people pursuing expanded abortion rights and gay marriage rights both seek not to only have their voice heard, but to silence all dissidents. The way gay marriage law is written, it truly endangers the religious freedoms of churches that oppose it. Now, the way abortion law is being written, it endangers the rights of medical professionals to practice according to their own conscience--particularly in regard to the credo 'Do no harm'. I hadn't thought to talk about serious subjects again so soon, but it seems this subject has a deadline, April 9th. Please go to the link below from which I'll now be quoting:

http://www.freedom2care.org/
You have a vitally important opportunity to immediately send a message to prevent a critical loss of access to healthcare professionals who are being systematically pressured to violate ethical standards. Here's what's been happening:

In August 2008, the U.S. Dept. of Health and Human Services (HHS) took long-overdue action to address a growing crisis of abortion-related discrimination that could force thousands of conscientious healthcare professionals out of medicine. After several months of public comment on its proposed regulation, in December 2008 HHS finalized a regulation that made clear the protections offered by three civil rights laws passed by Congress with bipartisan support.

The civil rights laws declare that American tax dollars will not fund programs in which healthcare professionals are fired, penalized or otherwise subjected to discrimination because of their ethical stance related to abortion and other morally controversial issues.

However, in March 2009, following protests from abortion special interest groups, the new administration officially declared plans to rescind--get rid of--the conscience-protecting regulation. The administration has, as required by law, called for public comment on the proposed plan to get rid of the conscience-protecting regulation, with a deadline of April 9, 2009.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Soap Box: Abortion and Gay Marriage (totally unrelated)

My friend just brought up some hugely hot topics (gun control, abortion, and gay marriage) on her blog and I left such a long comment, I decided to just post it on here, too. I'd been planning about talking about some of these things in-depth, with links and such, but haven't gotten to it yet. Maybe I still will. But here are some of my thoughts on abortion and gay marriage based on my core values and the many articles I've read. There just aren't any hyperlinks like I would've used if I had more time.

Abortion:

I am pro-life. I absolutely believe in choices. I just also believe in accountability. If you know having sex can get you pregnant and you do it willingly anyway, you had your choice and made your decision and you should face the consequences. I don't mean pregnancy is a punishment, but why should a girl be able to kill her fetus because it's inconvenient? When you play Russian roulette, sometimes you get shot. Sometimes, when you have sex, you get pregnant.

I think it's ridiculous that pregnant girls are so negatively stereotyped and socially punished. Their actions have been the same as all their sexually active friends, but they ended up pregnant. It's stupid to get punished for a consequence and not a behavior. Those girls need compassion and direction and friendship.

Adoption is a wonderful thing and girls who place unplanned babies for adoption are less likely to become pregnant again. It's great for the babies, too. Neither of those things can be said for abortion. People are using it like birth control. I think that's wrong. It's just accountability avoidance.

I also don't believe abortion is a privacy issue, which is what Roe v. Wade is based on.

From a more financial point of view, it ticks me off that abortions are often paid for by the government, but when I had a DNC because of a miscarriage a couple years ago, it cost me $4000. A DNC is essentially an abortion, but without the added cost of killing the baby first. If you look into Planned Parenthood's financials, you'll see they profit hugely from the abortion business and it is money, not "women's rights" that is their primary motivation.

Gay Marriage:

I think people in homosexual relationships should absolutely be able to visit each other in the hospital and be on insurance policies with each other, etc. That doesn't have anything to do with the government, though. The hospitals and insurance companies are in charge of those policies.

The government does have power over civil unions and they seem to work fine. When Melissa Etheridge was on Oprah talking about Prop 8 backlash, she said the only real difference between her civil union with her partner and legal marriage was that it made tax issues more complex for them. Um...big deal.

Marriage is a different issue from civil unions because of the legal consequences to religious groups who don't condone it. They will be persecuted and prosecuted if gay marriage is considered a civil liberty and they refuse to perform the marriages. They'll lose tax exempt status and sometimes even the right to perform traditional marriages.

Gay marriage is an issue because if something is considered a civil liberty or right, it won't be an issue to be discussed in sex ed, where parents who disagree can opt their kids out, but included in diversity classes and whatever other aspects of class a teacher chooses, without even having to inform parents what's being taught. (This happens in Massachusetts).

Gay marrage is not a civil rights issue because marriage is highly legislated already--there are age limits, blood tests in some states, and rules about how closely related you can be to your spouse. If such a socially foundational institution as marriage could be based only on sexual relationships instead of as a conduit for growing and rearing a responsible population, then it swings the door wide open legally to rights for pedophiles, incestuous relationships, bigamy and polygamy; I'm not a fan of any of those options. (Additionally, just money-wise, our states can't afford to give the married tax status to homosexual couples).

Gay marriage is an issue because if you believe in God, you should do your best to make sure the laws of the land reflect God's own laws--not because you want to force your views on others, but because it is your right as a citizen to vote for what you believe in. Many of our fundamental laws are based in the 10 Commandments and they've been working out so far. (The burden of proof for changing law should be on the people who want to change it, not the historically tested law.)What is righteous is also what is right. If most people share your beliefs and vote for them, that should be law. When the majority of the people choose wickedness, I believe it is their right, but there will be unfortunate consequences. If Prop 8 had lost the vote, I would've been sad, but respected the democratic process. If judges overturn the will of the majority of the people, I think that is wrong. It wasn't intended in our checks and balances system--judicial, executive, legislative--that anyone should have power over the people themselves. When judges take authority on themselves to do so, it reminds me of the corrupt judges from the Book of Mormon who lead the people to wickedness with their sophistry and conspiracy.

Additionally, people who believe the New Testament teaches that Christ condoned homosexuality are irresponsibly misinterpreting scripture. There is a vast difference between loving the sin and loving the sinner despite the sin.

It bothers me that some people will read this post and think I'm homophobic. I'm not. I think in general, I'm very "live and let live", but there are social and legal consequences that I find unacceptable with the advent of gay marriage. I think it's a shame that anyone who thoughtfully follows their conscience should be branded a bigot for disagreeing with someone else who may be louder. That said, I totally understand why lots of people disagree with my positions on these issues. I respect their views and I respect them.